Post by Sailor Jupiter Love on May 25, 2008 21:13:03 GMT -5
Four Months
The tarnished silver box sat on the table, and we were gathered around it in hushed anticipation. Mamoru stood behind it, his hands gently yet protectively resting on the box. He was excited and a little nervous, I could tell. Usagi stood at his side, unable to keep the grin from her expectant face.
After a few moments, we were all seated, and Mamoru spoke.
"After.. the many battles we've been through, I can consider it safe to say that not one of us gathered here will ever be able to forget how hard we worked to achieve all we have. And yet, as our memories grow with time and events dear to us are relived, there is a void, a void that, until recently, I hadn't been aware of. That is, until I stumbled across this - " Mamoru tapped the chest as he spoke. "Inside of this box holds something very dear to me, and once dear to you, my friends."
Mamoru unlocked the box from upside down and gently lifted the cover. Inside lay four crystals on dark velvet, each of them with their own uniquely ornate etchings. They were stunningly beautiful, though in an alarming kind of way. There was something that captivated me and yet repelled me all at once.
"During the Silver Millenium, as Prince of the Earth, I had four guardians at my side as I grew up. They were the equivalent of your own personalities and had much of the same responsibilities. They were also my best friends. You know them. You loved them once as I loved them. They fought at your sides, once, a long time ago. And yet, they also fought against you. In fact they fought so well that you were defeated and our lives were forever altered."
I flicked a blonde lock of hair over my shoulder and tried to control the growing anger that had begun to bubble deep inside of me.
"Malachite, Zoicite, Jadeite, Nephrite, sometimes I feel that they never really had a chance against the evil that seemed to determined to use them for it's twisted means. When we look back, we are torn between hate and sympathy when we think of them. But they served their time, died as criminals deserved, and were forgotten about - until a few months ago, when I found this chest and in it, these crystals. These crystals once contained the souls of the Generals. With a lot of hard work, we were able to release them. They now exist, just as you and I, with full memories of the past..."
"What we seek now," a new voice announced as the man I once loved and hated entered the room, "is to live our lives in peace."
The anger that had started deep inside now boiled beyond control. I jumped to my feet and slammed my hands on the table.
"And then what, Malachite? Pretend that absolutely nothing EVER happened and we all live happily ever after?! Are you insane, Mamoru? How can you unleash these.. these.. PEOPLE into the world after what they did?! You said it yourself: they fought against us, they defeated us and everything changed for the worse. How can you allow this?"
Mamoru didn't flinch. "We got second chances, Minako. Why don't they get one?"
"Because I didn't try to murder innocent people in the name of evil!"
"We give common criminals a chance to rehabilitate. Even murders are given that chance."
I looked at Usagi and growled, "Murderers aren't trying to destroy the world and all that is good."
"But they do. And we give them a chance to change. Don't let your anger of what happened in the past cloud your reasoning to that. You loved them once, too; don't forget that."
"I can't forget that, but I will also never forget how I hated them either."
I stormed out of the apartment, and into the darkness of the night.
I was still angry when I woke the next morning, and in an even worse mood since I'd barely slept. I had barely gotten dressed when I heard a loud knock on my door and I grumbled as I hurried to answer it.
Makoto bustled in, carrying coffee and homemade donuts. "You missed the finale last night. Wanna hear what happened?"
I shrugged. "Unless you uncorked a few bottles of Usagi's wine and had a giant orgy right there in the living room, no."
"You're still upset, aren't you."
I tore into one of the donuts before replying. "He knows what they did, and he still set them free," I said sofly.
"Don't you think they deserve a little redemption?"
"I think they got what they deserved when we wasted them individually the last time. Why couldn't Mamoru have just left them as they were?"
Makoto settled down onto my sofa. "Because he missed them, Mina. Usagi has us. Mamoru doesn't have any other male companions- that I know of. He needed them."
"Doesn't he have any other friends besides us?"
"You know he's always been a loner," Lita said.
I sighed and flopped down on the couch beside her. "I just wish he'd found some new friends instead of opening Pandora's chest."
"Pandora's box."
"I.. what?"
"Box. It's Pandora's BOX."
"Ugh, whatever. Either way, this sucks."
Makoto looked over at me. "What do you think they'll do?"
"The Generals? I don't know. If we're lucky they'll just leave us alone."
A few days later, I was on my way back home when I heard my name being called out. I turned to see Malachite, wearing normal clothes and seeming out of place among the public, crossing the street in my direction. I grunted in disgust and kept walking, hoping he would take the hint.
He didn't.
"Can I walk with you?"
I rolled my eyes. "I can't stop you."
He put my hand on my shoulder and we stopped. I turned to face him.
"I know you're still angry, Minako."
"Angry? ANGRY?! I'm beyond angry. You think it's so easy to just come back to life and not have to face responsibility for your actions? What do you expect me to do, Malachite? You just can't waltz back into someone's life like this and expect everything to be okay. Now leave me alone."
"Mina.. I know this isn't easy.. but.. I'm trying."
I shrugged his hand off my shoulder. "You're failing."
For a little after that, I managed to avoid Malachite as much as possible. I tried to tell myself it was because I was angry at him, but the truth was, after a while, I stopped being angry. The anger I'd had in the beginning became ambivalence. I simply stopped caring. What Mamoru had done was done and I'd had no control over it. The Generals were back - for better or worse - and I simply had to adjust.
But whenever we all got together, which was more often than I liked, Malachite made no effort to speak to me, and I wanted to keep it that way. Usagi wanted her happy ending, she with her prince and her best friends with the men she thought were our soulmates, but I couldn't do it. I wanted to, for Usagi's sake, but I didn't, and I felt no remorse for it. Eventually, though, we had to speak. I knew that when the moment came, it would change everything.
That moment came about two and half months later.
The fight began over nothing. I had arrived at the temple, early for once, in order to meet the girls for some shopping. Being early gave me a chance to truly observe the grounds and I realized I had missed so much. It was beautiful. Rei's grandfather had been careful to maintain the sense of peace his ancestors had so lovingly established. I found myself in awe as I took it all in. Before I could truly absorb the feeling, the crack of a twig broke my reverie.
I turned, unsure of what I was expecting to see.
Malachite stood behind me and to my right. He was gorgeous. I had a vague memory of having that thought once before, once in a long gone time. Yet the thought was accurate. Malachite was gorgeous and what made it even worse was his total lack of awareness on that part. I had always known him to be a little vain about his looks back in the Moon Kingdom. After all, he was the leader of the four, and felt a natural need to present himself well in public. I understood; it was something I faced as well. But in these times, so far removed from times of royalty and kingdoms, Malachite had taken an easier approach about his appearance, and it showed. He looked really good, and it pissed me off.
How dare he be so good looking? I was supposed to hate him and there I was, basking in his manly beauty, it was infuriating.
His eye caught mine, and he smiled. For half a second, I wondered how I could hate someone who smiled like he did, but soon erased that thought from my mind, and focused on my anger instead.
He spoke first. "What are you doing here?"
"Rei lives here, genius; what else would I be here for?"
Malachite shrugged. "Just making conversation while I wait for Jed. He said he'd meet me here."
"Jed? Rei's actually allowed him into her home?"
"From what I've been able to hear, they're hitting it off really well. The certainly deserve it."
"She has a boyfriend. So does Ami," I snapped.
"They're allowed other friends, Mina, and what they do is really none of your business."
"Tell Zoicite and Jadeite to stay away from Ami and Rei."
"They won't listen."
"Make them."
"I can't make them do anything. They're grown men."
"Ami and Rei have made it perfectly clear that - "
"Ah yes, the name dropping. They've got the message."
"--that they are both very much in love."
"Why are you so bitter, Minako?" I could hear pity and his voice in his question and it both angered and sickened me.
My eyes flew to his face. "Am I bitter?" It wasn't really a question, just a dare for him to say it again.
"Bitter and angry, yes, and I don't think it's me you're angry with."
"Oh screw you, Malachite, don't play pyschiatrist with me! You don't know me; don't act like you do!"
His voice was soft. "I used to, once, but you're right, I don't know you any longer. The Minako I knew was different. She didn't hang onto anger like you do. She was softer, kinder - "
"Things aren't all what you remember. Things have changed since you've been gone. How can you not expect the people you knew to change as well? I've grown up, Malachite, and I've seen things I probably shouldn't have since I was very young."
"My Minako was happy. Why are you so angry with me?"
Something inside me snapped. "I loved you," I confessed. "I loved you for so long and then I hated you for switching sides. I loved you because you were brainwashed and I hated you for being so weak as to allow it! I felt so betrayed and hurt, and I thought that you didn't really love me back because it seemed so easy to change you against me! And all this time, all I've been able to feel is anger."
He stepped closer. "I know that my coming back changed everything. I didn't have a choice. I know what I did, and I know why you're angry. What I've done in the past haunts me in my sleep."
A tear slipped from my eye and it threatened to infuriate me even more, but the look of anguish on Malachite's face quelled the anger. My heart felt like it was being pulled in two different directions. I could not deny that I was still angry, and yet seeing him so obviously upset touched something I had not felt in a long time.
"My only hope is that you can one day find it in your heart to forgive me," Malachite said softly.
I reached out before I was aware of what I was doing. My hand touched his face, lightly at first, as if I was afraid he would pull away. When I was sure he was comfortable with what I was doing, I closed the distance between us. My breath was heavy from the fight and from everything I was feeling. He, too, came closer, and before I knew it, we were kissing.
It's been four months since that afternoon at the temple, and in that time, I've learned to forgive Malachite for his past actions. It wasn't immediate and I find there are times when I still get pretty angry with him over nothing. Although things between us are progressing nicely, we can still have some pretty big arguments, but Malachite and I both know that it takes time. I have grown to love Malachite and he me, but we are realistic about our relationship. We do not put any undue pressure on the other; neither of us knows what the future will bring into our lives, but we are content merely enjoying what we have. I have high hopes, though, and the future looks bright.
Fin
The tarnished silver box sat on the table, and we were gathered around it in hushed anticipation. Mamoru stood behind it, his hands gently yet protectively resting on the box. He was excited and a little nervous, I could tell. Usagi stood at his side, unable to keep the grin from her expectant face.
After a few moments, we were all seated, and Mamoru spoke.
"After.. the many battles we've been through, I can consider it safe to say that not one of us gathered here will ever be able to forget how hard we worked to achieve all we have. And yet, as our memories grow with time and events dear to us are relived, there is a void, a void that, until recently, I hadn't been aware of. That is, until I stumbled across this - " Mamoru tapped the chest as he spoke. "Inside of this box holds something very dear to me, and once dear to you, my friends."
Mamoru unlocked the box from upside down and gently lifted the cover. Inside lay four crystals on dark velvet, each of them with their own uniquely ornate etchings. They were stunningly beautiful, though in an alarming kind of way. There was something that captivated me and yet repelled me all at once.
"During the Silver Millenium, as Prince of the Earth, I had four guardians at my side as I grew up. They were the equivalent of your own personalities and had much of the same responsibilities. They were also my best friends. You know them. You loved them once as I loved them. They fought at your sides, once, a long time ago. And yet, they also fought against you. In fact they fought so well that you were defeated and our lives were forever altered."
I flicked a blonde lock of hair over my shoulder and tried to control the growing anger that had begun to bubble deep inside of me.
"Malachite, Zoicite, Jadeite, Nephrite, sometimes I feel that they never really had a chance against the evil that seemed to determined to use them for it's twisted means. When we look back, we are torn between hate and sympathy when we think of them. But they served their time, died as criminals deserved, and were forgotten about - until a few months ago, when I found this chest and in it, these crystals. These crystals once contained the souls of the Generals. With a lot of hard work, we were able to release them. They now exist, just as you and I, with full memories of the past..."
"What we seek now," a new voice announced as the man I once loved and hated entered the room, "is to live our lives in peace."
The anger that had started deep inside now boiled beyond control. I jumped to my feet and slammed my hands on the table.
"And then what, Malachite? Pretend that absolutely nothing EVER happened and we all live happily ever after?! Are you insane, Mamoru? How can you unleash these.. these.. PEOPLE into the world after what they did?! You said it yourself: they fought against us, they defeated us and everything changed for the worse. How can you allow this?"
Mamoru didn't flinch. "We got second chances, Minako. Why don't they get one?"
"Because I didn't try to murder innocent people in the name of evil!"
"We give common criminals a chance to rehabilitate. Even murders are given that chance."
I looked at Usagi and growled, "Murderers aren't trying to destroy the world and all that is good."
"But they do. And we give them a chance to change. Don't let your anger of what happened in the past cloud your reasoning to that. You loved them once, too; don't forget that."
"I can't forget that, but I will also never forget how I hated them either."
I stormed out of the apartment, and into the darkness of the night.
I was still angry when I woke the next morning, and in an even worse mood since I'd barely slept. I had barely gotten dressed when I heard a loud knock on my door and I grumbled as I hurried to answer it.
Makoto bustled in, carrying coffee and homemade donuts. "You missed the finale last night. Wanna hear what happened?"
I shrugged. "Unless you uncorked a few bottles of Usagi's wine and had a giant orgy right there in the living room, no."
"You're still upset, aren't you."
I tore into one of the donuts before replying. "He knows what they did, and he still set them free," I said sofly.
"Don't you think they deserve a little redemption?"
"I think they got what they deserved when we wasted them individually the last time. Why couldn't Mamoru have just left them as they were?"
Makoto settled down onto my sofa. "Because he missed them, Mina. Usagi has us. Mamoru doesn't have any other male companions- that I know of. He needed them."
"Doesn't he have any other friends besides us?"
"You know he's always been a loner," Lita said.
I sighed and flopped down on the couch beside her. "I just wish he'd found some new friends instead of opening Pandora's chest."
"Pandora's box."
"I.. what?"
"Box. It's Pandora's BOX."
"Ugh, whatever. Either way, this sucks."
Makoto looked over at me. "What do you think they'll do?"
"The Generals? I don't know. If we're lucky they'll just leave us alone."
A few days later, I was on my way back home when I heard my name being called out. I turned to see Malachite, wearing normal clothes and seeming out of place among the public, crossing the street in my direction. I grunted in disgust and kept walking, hoping he would take the hint.
He didn't.
"Can I walk with you?"
I rolled my eyes. "I can't stop you."
He put my hand on my shoulder and we stopped. I turned to face him.
"I know you're still angry, Minako."
"Angry? ANGRY?! I'm beyond angry. You think it's so easy to just come back to life and not have to face responsibility for your actions? What do you expect me to do, Malachite? You just can't waltz back into someone's life like this and expect everything to be okay. Now leave me alone."
"Mina.. I know this isn't easy.. but.. I'm trying."
I shrugged his hand off my shoulder. "You're failing."
For a little after that, I managed to avoid Malachite as much as possible. I tried to tell myself it was because I was angry at him, but the truth was, after a while, I stopped being angry. The anger I'd had in the beginning became ambivalence. I simply stopped caring. What Mamoru had done was done and I'd had no control over it. The Generals were back - for better or worse - and I simply had to adjust.
But whenever we all got together, which was more often than I liked, Malachite made no effort to speak to me, and I wanted to keep it that way. Usagi wanted her happy ending, she with her prince and her best friends with the men she thought were our soulmates, but I couldn't do it. I wanted to, for Usagi's sake, but I didn't, and I felt no remorse for it. Eventually, though, we had to speak. I knew that when the moment came, it would change everything.
That moment came about two and half months later.
The fight began over nothing. I had arrived at the temple, early for once, in order to meet the girls for some shopping. Being early gave me a chance to truly observe the grounds and I realized I had missed so much. It was beautiful. Rei's grandfather had been careful to maintain the sense of peace his ancestors had so lovingly established. I found myself in awe as I took it all in. Before I could truly absorb the feeling, the crack of a twig broke my reverie.
I turned, unsure of what I was expecting to see.
Malachite stood behind me and to my right. He was gorgeous. I had a vague memory of having that thought once before, once in a long gone time. Yet the thought was accurate. Malachite was gorgeous and what made it even worse was his total lack of awareness on that part. I had always known him to be a little vain about his looks back in the Moon Kingdom. After all, he was the leader of the four, and felt a natural need to present himself well in public. I understood; it was something I faced as well. But in these times, so far removed from times of royalty and kingdoms, Malachite had taken an easier approach about his appearance, and it showed. He looked really good, and it pissed me off.
How dare he be so good looking? I was supposed to hate him and there I was, basking in his manly beauty, it was infuriating.
His eye caught mine, and he smiled. For half a second, I wondered how I could hate someone who smiled like he did, but soon erased that thought from my mind, and focused on my anger instead.
He spoke first. "What are you doing here?"
"Rei lives here, genius; what else would I be here for?"
Malachite shrugged. "Just making conversation while I wait for Jed. He said he'd meet me here."
"Jed? Rei's actually allowed him into her home?"
"From what I've been able to hear, they're hitting it off really well. The certainly deserve it."
"She has a boyfriend. So does Ami," I snapped.
"They're allowed other friends, Mina, and what they do is really none of your business."
"Tell Zoicite and Jadeite to stay away from Ami and Rei."
"They won't listen."
"Make them."
"I can't make them do anything. They're grown men."
"Ami and Rei have made it perfectly clear that - "
"Ah yes, the name dropping. They've got the message."
"--that they are both very much in love."
"Why are you so bitter, Minako?" I could hear pity and his voice in his question and it both angered and sickened me.
My eyes flew to his face. "Am I bitter?" It wasn't really a question, just a dare for him to say it again.
"Bitter and angry, yes, and I don't think it's me you're angry with."
"Oh screw you, Malachite, don't play pyschiatrist with me! You don't know me; don't act like you do!"
His voice was soft. "I used to, once, but you're right, I don't know you any longer. The Minako I knew was different. She didn't hang onto anger like you do. She was softer, kinder - "
"Things aren't all what you remember. Things have changed since you've been gone. How can you not expect the people you knew to change as well? I've grown up, Malachite, and I've seen things I probably shouldn't have since I was very young."
"My Minako was happy. Why are you so angry with me?"
Something inside me snapped. "I loved you," I confessed. "I loved you for so long and then I hated you for switching sides. I loved you because you were brainwashed and I hated you for being so weak as to allow it! I felt so betrayed and hurt, and I thought that you didn't really love me back because it seemed so easy to change you against me! And all this time, all I've been able to feel is anger."
He stepped closer. "I know that my coming back changed everything. I didn't have a choice. I know what I did, and I know why you're angry. What I've done in the past haunts me in my sleep."
A tear slipped from my eye and it threatened to infuriate me even more, but the look of anguish on Malachite's face quelled the anger. My heart felt like it was being pulled in two different directions. I could not deny that I was still angry, and yet seeing him so obviously upset touched something I had not felt in a long time.
"My only hope is that you can one day find it in your heart to forgive me," Malachite said softly.
I reached out before I was aware of what I was doing. My hand touched his face, lightly at first, as if I was afraid he would pull away. When I was sure he was comfortable with what I was doing, I closed the distance between us. My breath was heavy from the fight and from everything I was feeling. He, too, came closer, and before I knew it, we were kissing.
It's been four months since that afternoon at the temple, and in that time, I've learned to forgive Malachite for his past actions. It wasn't immediate and I find there are times when I still get pretty angry with him over nothing. Although things between us are progressing nicely, we can still have some pretty big arguments, but Malachite and I both know that it takes time. I have grown to love Malachite and he me, but we are realistic about our relationship. We do not put any undue pressure on the other; neither of us knows what the future will bring into our lives, but we are content merely enjoying what we have. I have high hopes, though, and the future looks bright.
Fin
